Its been a little depressing today. I'm feeling pretty low after this morning's session. I'd taken my FD201 images in to college to ask for help with some adjustments I wanted to make. However, I got more than I bargained for. After describing that the theme for my project is longing, isolation and loneliness, I was given some constructive criticism. In short, that none of my images conveyed these emotions and that I needed to shoot again to make my images bleaker and darker. The suggestion was that I should find an urban landscape or a more solitary subject that would give a clearer picture of the emotion I want to convey to my viewer.
I was very upset; the deadline is next week and I am already feeling the pressure to get everything done. The sentiments I received were not what I wanted to hear at this time. I felt that with time rushing by, and having already shot approximately six films on the first image for the project, I needed some encouragement. However, I know that the criticism wasn't said with malice or insensitivity but only said to challenge me and improve my work.
As the day has moved on and I have thought about this, I do understand what was meant and that my images maybe don't show the emotion that I am feeling about being unable to go home. But it is very disappointing when I have put so much work and effort into this project, to hear that my work hasn't yet been as successful as I had hoped, at least in the opinion of one person.
Feeling as I did, I spoke to my other lecturers and they assured me that this is commonplace. The opinion of one person is not the opinion of all. I felt a little reassured and appreciated their support, but unfortunately being sometimes an oversensitive soul, and only recently having persuaded myself that being an artist is all about having confidence in my own work, and being strong, and occasionally single minded when others criticise my work, I am however inclined to dwell on such criticism, and it has affected my mood.
As a result of feeling knocked sideways and jaded, and once again beating myself up because of doubts I have in my abilities as an artist/photographer, I decided that I would try to take advantage of the bleakness I felt inside. I was now missing my family even more, wishing they were here to comfort me. I loaded another film into my Medium Format Camera and went for a walk in the park.
I shot a few frames until the light was too dark to shoot more, and thought that if tomorrow morning brings more rain and mist it would give me an opportunity to try and photograph the emotions I am feeling now. Had this have happened yesterday, the weather conditions this morning had been ideal.
I will have to wait and see what the results of this film are. This will be my final opportunity to shoot film as I will have to hand them in for printing, at the latest, on Monday. My Group Crit is on Thursday afternoon, so it is unlikely that I will be able to have them processed by then.
So we'll see what happens. You never know, I may be able to thank my critic, if indeed the final submission is taken from this final film.
About Me
- Penelope Davies
- Carmarthen, West Wales, United Kingdom
- All images Copyright of Penelope Davies.
Tuesday 29 November 2011
Monday 28 November 2011
Busy ...Busy...
With two assigments to work on and both deadlines very near now, I'm feeling just a little harassed! I've shot quite a few films in the past few weeks, some successful, some not. I am using my Mamyia Medium Format Camera for both projects. Today I've taken the final two films for FD201, to Spectrum to process. I've got everything crossed as I simply won't have time to shoot and process any more colour film.
I have one of my final images, but did not start working on the second image early enough to enable me to experiment. As the second image is a self - portrait and I had unfortunately not been able to find a long Cable Shutter Release until last Friday, I feel a little rushed. One of my friends who is studying an MA at the Art College had helped me with two films but as he uses Digital and hasn't had much experience with Film, the images weren't good enough to use. If i had wanted silhouettes, they would have been fine. This is in no way his fault. I was grateful for a helping hand and learned a lot about the composition I wanted, the poses I should take, the conrolled lighting I would have to use, and it also reminded me of something I already knew, that I work better alone. I can focus completely on the task in hand. Working alone gives me a better opportunity to concentrate on the mood I want to create.
Finding a 20ft Cable Release was a wonderful find, the only problem I had was hiding the cable from the camera and only being able to use one hand for effect. I will only know if everything came together when I collect my negatives on Wednesday afternoon. Having the Calbe Release will help me in the future because my work seems to be heading towards self - portraiture as a means of finding my identity as an Artist. My work is personal. Conceptually I am looking at Ancestry, Belonging, Recognition, Longing, Isolation and Loneliness along with an array of other ideas that come to mind while I m working. My work is concentrated on the landscape and the home. I am fascinted and inspired by the painter Johannes Vermeer; his lighting effects are both elegant and exquisite in my eyes. I am also drawn to the window and especially to north ambient light. I have looked at his paintings time and again and always see something new in them.
Many of the Artists I have researched have been inspired by Vermeer's work, Uta Barth, Tom Hunter and Erina Brotherus. All have a "painterly" style of photography that I am drawn too. The concept of Uta Barth's work is in the act of seeing and of looking. She encourages the viewers of her work to see what is not there. Every day life holds more than what we think we see. So much of what is around us, we miss, we take for granted or we simple dont see anything at all.
Elina Brotherus "The New Painting" series has soothing horizons and mounatin landscapes inspired by the German painter Caspar David Fredrick (1774 - 1840) that conveys the idea that the landscape has to be given time. The landscape is a feeling that can be internalised. (Quote from Elina Brotherus(2005) text by Susanna Pettersson).
Brotherus likes to work "close to home" as do I. I also like to look out of the window and sit in contemplation, and I love the ambient light that brings the outside, inside. Sometimes I will enter a room at home and gasp at the beauty that the light brings into the room. I don't feel that I need to go far from home to search for a photograph as it is often the weather conditions that draw me to a scene as well as the early morning and evening light.
I love the landscape and so I do visit the countryside and coastline near our city; but for the two projects I am working on at present, one is based on a longing to "go home" to Wales and the sense of loneliness and isolation I feel living away from my family; and the other relates to my fascination with Ancestry and objects of memory, namely "the photograph."
I'm enjoying the Second Year of the Degree very much as we are being encouraged to find our niche as photographers and artists. I am trying to put some depth into my work, to give it meaning both to myself and to the viewer.
I have one of my final images, but did not start working on the second image early enough to enable me to experiment. As the second image is a self - portrait and I had unfortunately not been able to find a long Cable Shutter Release until last Friday, I feel a little rushed. One of my friends who is studying an MA at the Art College had helped me with two films but as he uses Digital and hasn't had much experience with Film, the images weren't good enough to use. If i had wanted silhouettes, they would have been fine. This is in no way his fault. I was grateful for a helping hand and learned a lot about the composition I wanted, the poses I should take, the conrolled lighting I would have to use, and it also reminded me of something I already knew, that I work better alone. I can focus completely on the task in hand. Working alone gives me a better opportunity to concentrate on the mood I want to create.
Finding a 20ft Cable Release was a wonderful find, the only problem I had was hiding the cable from the camera and only being able to use one hand for effect. I will only know if everything came together when I collect my negatives on Wednesday afternoon. Having the Calbe Release will help me in the future because my work seems to be heading towards self - portraiture as a means of finding my identity as an Artist. My work is personal. Conceptually I am looking at Ancestry, Belonging, Recognition, Longing, Isolation and Loneliness along with an array of other ideas that come to mind while I m working. My work is concentrated on the landscape and the home. I am fascinted and inspired by the painter Johannes Vermeer; his lighting effects are both elegant and exquisite in my eyes. I am also drawn to the window and especially to north ambient light. I have looked at his paintings time and again and always see something new in them.
Many of the Artists I have researched have been inspired by Vermeer's work, Uta Barth, Tom Hunter and Erina Brotherus. All have a "painterly" style of photography that I am drawn too. The concept of Uta Barth's work is in the act of seeing and of looking. She encourages the viewers of her work to see what is not there. Every day life holds more than what we think we see. So much of what is around us, we miss, we take for granted or we simple dont see anything at all.
Elina Brotherus "The New Painting" series has soothing horizons and mounatin landscapes inspired by the German painter Caspar David Fredrick (1774 - 1840) that conveys the idea that the landscape has to be given time. The landscape is a feeling that can be internalised. (Quote from Elina Brotherus(2005) text by Susanna Pettersson).
Brotherus likes to work "close to home" as do I. I also like to look out of the window and sit in contemplation, and I love the ambient light that brings the outside, inside. Sometimes I will enter a room at home and gasp at the beauty that the light brings into the room. I don't feel that I need to go far from home to search for a photograph as it is often the weather conditions that draw me to a scene as well as the early morning and evening light.
I love the landscape and so I do visit the countryside and coastline near our city; but for the two projects I am working on at present, one is based on a longing to "go home" to Wales and the sense of loneliness and isolation I feel living away from my family; and the other relates to my fascination with Ancestry and objects of memory, namely "the photograph."
I'm enjoying the Second Year of the Degree very much as we are being encouraged to find our niche as photographers and artists. I am trying to put some depth into my work, to give it meaning both to myself and to the viewer.
Dartmoor (Image for FD201 "Longing")
Digital Image shot At Home experimenting with light and poses for FD201 "Longing")
Tuesday 15 November 2011
My Narrative
I have decided to photograph my narrative in Black and White and have been experimenting with 35mm and 120mm film.
My idea is centered around Ancestry, Nostalgia, Memory and the Object. I have been taking photographs of my family out into the landscape pegging them on to trees. I'm finding this a little troublesome as the wind keeps blowing the photographs away. I've been shooting early in the morning and late in the afternoon. The days are so short now that daylight hours are limited. I'm not sure that my idea is working. I like the idea and I want to continue with it; I want to develop the idea further but time is running out and I'm worried that I will not be able to develop the idea in enough depth. I have also considered using an old mirror, a family heirloom that has many layers of meaning for me.
There is also an element of being "close to home." The locations I am using are Central Park and Hyde Park Cemetery which are both in close proximity to our home.
These are two of the images I have taken up to the present time.
My idea is centered around Ancestry, Nostalgia, Memory and the Object. I have been taking photographs of my family out into the landscape pegging them on to trees. I'm finding this a little troublesome as the wind keeps blowing the photographs away. I've been shooting early in the morning and late in the afternoon. The days are so short now that daylight hours are limited. I'm not sure that my idea is working. I like the idea and I want to continue with it; I want to develop the idea further but time is running out and I'm worried that I will not be able to develop the idea in enough depth. I have also considered using an old mirror, a family heirloom that has many layers of meaning for me.
There is also an element of being "close to home." The locations I am using are Central Park and Hyde Park Cemetery which are both in close proximity to our home.
These are two of the images I have taken up to the present time.
Narrative Workshop Notes
The deadlines for two of our Assignments are drawing close. I have been working steadily on both but still feel that I have much to do.
Today we had a workshop about Editing and Sequencing starting with the works of other Artists.
Firstly Simon Roberts "Motherland." A British Photographer who went to Russia and shot 30,000 frames of film. This is a huge number of images and must have taken months to edit. As with the other Artists we looked at, Roberts began the process by scanning the images and making hundreds of contact sheets. It is a process of elimination deciding at every stage which images work best and which begin to form a pattern and which ones to discard.
It was advised in this session, that we always show our work to peers or others' that we trust to give us an honest opinion about our work. Not on the Internet where the quality of image deteriorates, but to actually print images of at least a size 6 x 4 and to spread them out. This is the best way to "see" what lies before you and pick out images that sit well together.
Other artists mentioned were Anne Celine Jaeger (Image Makers, Image Takers), Mary Ellen Mark, Eugen Richards, Rankin, Alec Soth. David Hurn's book "On being a photographer" was also recommended.
The things to consider for a narrative of images are:
The beginning, Middle and End, the chronological order, linear sequence, general - specific, the opening image is important as is the conclusion.
Slow down and connect to your images and notice which ones make an impact on you.
We were asked to consider who our audience will be and what we want to convey in our narrative.
Today we had a workshop about Editing and Sequencing starting with the works of other Artists.
Simon Roberts "Motherland"
thanks to shenphotoblog.blogspot.com for this image
Firstly Simon Roberts "Motherland." A British Photographer who went to Russia and shot 30,000 frames of film. This is a huge number of images and must have taken months to edit. As with the other Artists we looked at, Roberts began the process by scanning the images and making hundreds of contact sheets. It is a process of elimination deciding at every stage which images work best and which begin to form a pattern and which ones to discard.
It was advised in this session, that we always show our work to peers or others' that we trust to give us an honest opinion about our work. Not on the Internet where the quality of image deteriorates, but to actually print images of at least a size 6 x 4 and to spread them out. This is the best way to "see" what lies before you and pick out images that sit well together.
Other artists mentioned were Anne Celine Jaeger (Image Makers, Image Takers), Mary Ellen Mark, Eugen Richards, Rankin, Alec Soth. David Hurn's book "On being a photographer" was also recommended.
Mary Ellen Mark
thanks to digitaljournalist.org for this image
Eugene Richards
with thanks to ciubuxabinaphoto.wordpress.com for this image
The things to consider for a narrative of images are:
The beginning, Middle and End, the chronological order, linear sequence, general - specific, the opening image is important as is the conclusion.
Slow down and connect to your images and notice which ones make an impact on you.
We were asked to consider who our audience will be and what we want to convey in our narrative.
Saturday 12 November 2011
Photorapher or Artist?
Serene Morning
I want to be more creative with my images and I am moving towards taking objects out into the landscape to make “art.” This may seem pretentious to some people, I don’t mean to sound this way. I was looking at some Wedding Photographer’s work and know that I just couldn’t do this, neither am I a commercial photographer, mainly due to the fact that I don’t like enclosed spaces. The studio for me is extremely claustrophobic. This would be a bit of a stumbling block when it came to doing commercial work. So as from now, I think I will concentrate on being an Artist and not worry so much if my photographic work is not as sharp or technically perfect as I think it should be. As an Artist I feel that I can have more freedom, more poetic license to experiment and be creative just for Art’s sake!
Friday 11 November 2011
What the bleep do we know!? [DVD recording] / directed by William Arntz, Betsy Chasse and Mark Vicente
Film Poster
with thanks to caprifilms.com for this image
I chose this DVD at random from the college library. Its cover made me think that in some way its content would be "mystical" or "spiritual." I was very surprised when I began to watch it, finding that it was in fact about Quantum Physics. I'm not sure whether to describe it as a film or a documentary; I will settle on describing it as a mixture of both genres.
I was fascinated by its content and could even go as far as to say that it has changed the way I think about the human mind and body. I have always believed that our minds are the power behind our well being, our intellect and our emotions, but until I watched this DVD, I had not really considered how powerful the mind is.
I know that I should not believe every word said by the philosophers and scientists interviewed, but their beliefs made me think a lot about my beliefs and the way I think.
One thing that really stood out for me was that whatever I am addicted too will continue to create in me a negative thought process. I am now beginning to notice exactly what I am addicted too on a mental and emotional level. The discussion centered on being additcted to certain ways of thinking, and that if we are unable to stop ourselves from thinking in those certain ways, then we are addicted to our habitual thought processes.
For instance I am constantly in need of reassurance because of the lack of faith I have in my own abilities. This has become a part of myself that I find very annoying and frustrating. Before watching the DVD, I hd wondered what it was about my past experiences that made me this way. But now, instead of trying to delve into my subconscious, thinking and trying to analyse this need in myself, I am simply changing these thoughts into a more positive mind set. I am allowing myself to believe in myself and my abilities. I no longer have the tolerance with myself to dwell on any weaknesses that I have. Instead I want to embrace the fact that if I look at problems and challenges in a different way, then I can find solutions to overcome those problems. Of course this is wonderful in theory, but the doing will take some time to establish a change in those habitual thoughts that plague me.
In this film the theory was explained in very simple terms. It was demonstrated through animation showing what happens when our thoughts manifest themselves in peptides which in turn cling to the cells in our bodies causing distress, mistrust in ourselves and a lack of confidence in certain situations. There are many other fears, worries, thought processes experienced by humans but it seems that we all have the ability to change the way we think and how our bodies react. If we learn to accept that anything is possible and think about what we really want in life then thouse thoughts will manifest and slowly what we want is what we will get!
It may all seem very obvious but sometimes an epiphany occurs because of some small change in the way a philosophy is heard, read or seen. This is what happened to me when I watched this documentary film. I knew already what I had to do to change my thought processes, but this film almost screamed it out at me and at last I truly understood.
Thursday 10 November 2011
Visit to West Wales
I visited my family in Wales during Reading Week and took along my Mamyia 67 Medium Format Camera so that I could start shooting images for our FD201 assignment.
For this project I have taken the "Circle" from the Coen Bros film "Hudsucker Proxy," adopting the circle as a theme for the cycle of life. Wales is my home and it is very special to me. My family all live there now having returned to Wales after many years living elsewhere in the UK, and abroad. I am the only member of my immediate family living "elsewhere." Maybe it is because my siblings are all in Wales, or maybe as I grow older, I realise even more how much I miss the landscape.
In my images I am trying to convey the longing I have to return to Wales and how at this point in my life, it is not yet possible. It is out of my reach.
I have researched the work of Elina Brotherus, Brea Souders and Jonathan Critchley, as well as looking again at the art works of Joannes Vermeer whose enchanting and elegant lighting is always an inspiration to me.
We have to submit two images in different locations. My first will be of the landscape, and my second will be an image of my daughter looking out of a window. My bedroom faces north; north light is beautifully evocative and I'm hoping to achieve an atmospheric image that conveys my yearning for "home."
During our Formative Assessment on Tuesday this week, I was able to show the images I had shot in Wales. Both our lecturers commented that there are a few that I could use, but that I should continue to develop my idea, shoot more images and "see what happens." I am happy to do this, in fact the presentation and the comments I was given have motivated me.
Here are some of the images from my trip to Wales.
For this project I have taken the "Circle" from the Coen Bros film "Hudsucker Proxy," adopting the circle as a theme for the cycle of life. Wales is my home and it is very special to me. My family all live there now having returned to Wales after many years living elsewhere in the UK, and abroad. I am the only member of my immediate family living "elsewhere." Maybe it is because my siblings are all in Wales, or maybe as I grow older, I realise even more how much I miss the landscape.
In my images I am trying to convey the longing I have to return to Wales and how at this point in my life, it is not yet possible. It is out of my reach.
I have researched the work of Elina Brotherus, Brea Souders and Jonathan Critchley, as well as looking again at the art works of Joannes Vermeer whose enchanting and elegant lighting is always an inspiration to me.
We have to submit two images in different locations. My first will be of the landscape, and my second will be an image of my daughter looking out of a window. My bedroom faces north; north light is beautifully evocative and I'm hoping to achieve an atmospheric image that conveys my yearning for "home."
During our Formative Assessment on Tuesday this week, I was able to show the images I had shot in Wales. Both our lecturers commented that there are a few that I could use, but that I should continue to develop my idea, shoot more images and "see what happens." I am happy to do this, in fact the presentation and the comments I was given have motivated me.
Here are some of the images from my trip to Wales.
River Taf, Llanfallteg West, South Wales
Preseli Hills, Cardigan.
Red Berries
Manorbier Castle, Pembrokeshire, Wales
The Old Baptist Chapel, LLanfallteg West
Llanfallteg, My Home from 1960 to 1989 though I left in 1978
Capel Mair, Llanfallteg.(Denomination Indepndent) Here I was Christened and Confirmed
Preseli Hills, Cardigan. The Barbed Wire prevents me from "getting there"
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)